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~*1 John 4:7*~

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.


If you put "confusing" in the box at the bottom of this post, please comment on how you were confused and my team and I will try and clear things up so you won't be confused any longer! :)
- Princess Catherine ~*~

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Bonus Question: Does It Matter What You Call It?

Bonus Question:

Dating, courting. Courting, dating. Does it matter what you call it?
Can you call dating, courting and/or courting, dating?


I (Catherine) don't see why it bothers people when I say "I'm not going to date, I'm going to court!". Is it the word "courting"? Or is it that they are afraid I won't "meet that someone special" if I don't "make myself available" because I'm courting?

That being said, does it really matter what you call it?

This is my opinion, but I say yes. Here's why.

If you call something a cucumber, but it is really a zucchini, and you were expecting a cucumber, wouldn't you be a little surprised when your "cucumber" tasted like a zucchini instead of a cucumber?

What do I mean by that?
Look at it this way.

When you here the word "date" (not date like a date on the calendar or the food ;) or "dating" what do you think?
Romantic dinners in a restaurant by candle light? Going to the movies? Sitting at home and talking with your someone special? Holding hands with each other?
Notice, in all of those, you don't think of dating as a "family" activity, right? I mean, dating is for two, not three or more.

And when you hear the word "court" or "courting" what do you think of?
Sitting uncomfortably on the family room floor, the two "love birds" on opposite sides of the room and five family members in between them? The daughter rolling her eyes at her parents? Or maybe it's the son trying to inconspicuously get closer to his special girl?
If it is, you are sadly mistaken! Courting isn't the word for family's trying to divide the couple, it's the family trying to bring them together!

But if you are someone who wants to court, but calls it dating, you aren't letting the special someone know what you mean. You don't actually mean dating, you mean courting, but how do they know that? Simple; they don't.

So, does it really matter whether you call it "dating" or "courting". I think it does. But there always is another option. You could give them a list (verbally or on paper) of what your definition of dating is.

Take your pick!

Princess Catherine ~*~


  1. I was the one who had said before that I said I called it dating not courting, so thank you for this article! However one more thing, I don't want it to be a family thing!! My dad said the boy needs to ask him before I 'date' (which my 'bf' did) and so hes perfectly fine with the guy I'm 'dating'. But I thought courting is when the guy asks your parents to court you? Not a whole family party night!!! That would be way to embarrassing! SO am I really dating then, not courting? Or a little of both, or what?

  2. Dear Anonymous,

    Courting is not as much a family activity, but the family encouraging and helping you with the relationship.

    There will be a couple of times your boyfriend might hang out with your family or you might hang out with his, but that is to get to know more about him, in a sense.

    Courting isn't just all of the family, it is using the family to fall back on if problems arise. This is one of the main reasons courting couples don't break up with each other as much because they are willing to work things out.

    Private nights are part of courting so you can get to know the guy yourself, but remember that your family is there to help you if you need them! :)

    I hope this helps!

    Princess Catherine ~*~