Learning Through Disappointment

NOTE: This was a post that appeared on my other blog, Just Passing By.

A day ago, I was really excited. Can ya guess why? I was going to be an extra in a new movie that will be coming out! I was so excited, especially since it was about a Christian soccer player. Soccer is, like, MY hobby besides all the other stuff, and I absolutely LOVE it. And it's always been my secret dream to be an actress. I'm horribly un-photogenic and I'm not convinced I can act (not to mention I'm kinda shy) but it's my secret goal. So when I found out about this, I was over-the-top excited. I was convinced this was the answer to my prayers, and it would lead me into being an actress!

But, like so many things, this conclusion was not to be.

It so happened that on all the dates of filming we had stuff going on. There was no way we could do it. I was so disappointed.

No, disappointed doesn't really grasp it. I was devastated. It's everything I imagined what having your dream trampled on would feel like. Yes, I'm really melodramatic, I know. But still, I was really, really looking forward to it.

And then, after crying a little and wondering if God was trying to torture me, I got to thinking.

You know what, maybe God doesn't want me to start as an extra. Maybe he wants me to start my acting career as the star of the show. ;)

Maybe he has a different plan in mind, one that will be sooooo much better than the one I was hoping for.

Hey, maybe he doesn't want me to be an actress at all.

Maybe he knows more than I do about the consequences of being famous--the media watching your every move, all the temptations a star goes through, the loneliness.

Perhaps God knows that being famous will turn me into, say, Miley Cyrus (no offense, Miley fans, but to me she's the worst I could ever get). After all, I've never been famous before.

Or perhaps God wants me to work on something else more important in my life first, such as being a better sister to my lil' siblings, especially one in particular. If I'm faithful with a little, I could be trusted with much.

But who can grasp God's mind? It's so above us, and I'm really thankful for that. God will do what's best for me, even if I don't think it's good at the time.

So, even while I'm working through all of this, I'm getting more grateful. Our pastor preached on Sunday about Jacob wrestling with the Angel of the Lord, and how the Angel merely touched Jacob to dislocate his hip, making Jacob to limp for the rest of his life. It caused him to lean on the Lord solely for his protection.

Sometimes, a limp can be one of the best thing God gives us. It teaches, corrects, and humbles, and in the end we should be happy he gave us this 'limp'.

So, while I'm waiting to make my famous debut as an actress (lol), I'll work hard on being a better daughter and sister. It's even better than being a star, after all.

In Christ,

Princess Izori

P.S. This movie that I'm talking about is For the Glory. I know two people who will be having some big roles in it (I also know some other extras). It'll be really weird watching the movie and saying, "Hey! We know him!" Lol. Oh, yes, and it's a professional movie. Just in case you were wondering. =)